Did you ever try to run away from home when you didn’t like it as a child? You may have packed your belongings and taken shelter at a close friend’s house. But after some time you could not remember the reason for being away from home and as the night was getting darker, you decided to go back home. This must have happened too many of us at least once in our lives, but what this story strongly emphasizes is that there is a huge difference between thinking about escaping and actually escaping. Miss Atrat Zahra Naqvi is working as a psychologist at Wellingways and Sadaqat Clinic Lahore. He obtained his MSc Nafisat degree from Punjab University with First Class and Advanced Diploma in Clinical Psychology. He completed his professional training from Gangaram Hospital under Dr. Iram Bukhari. He worked at DHQ Hospital in Chiniot as a Psychiatrist on Excise Project
Runaways are usually different family members, including multiple children, adults, wives and husbands. The reason may be another person living in the same house who makes the house an intolerable place for the rest of the house due to their toxic personality. In fact, those who possess toxic attitudes are not even aware that they are, or do not intend to be. But despite this, they do not have the right to hurt other people. People with toxic attitudes are those who hurt, exploit, and oppress others. Apparently these people look very happy but they tend to hurt others. Interestingly, sometimes a parent and sometimes a spouse can be the owner of toxic attitudes. Every year, a large number of minors run away from their homes and are found sleeping on the streets. When they are asked about their intention and intention, they do not have any strong reason to run away and do not pay attention.
Taking an escape route, the minors hastily decide to run away, hoping that everything will turn out as they imagined. Unfortunately, this results in more suffering and difficulties in their lives than before, including drugs, sexual abuse, lost school days, and lost opportunities for growth and success. Most running away from home is driven by an element of shame. Such shame is related to poverty, exploitation, alcoholism in the home, and many other similar reasons. Immature individuals experience emotional, psychological, and spiritual escape before physical escape. There are other factors behind running away from home, including abuse, drug abuse in the family, conflict, and social pressure, arrival of a new member in the family, intimidation, relationship problems, family breakdown and loneliness. Pin included. Sometimes the person also runs away from home because he feels that the home is too tight for him, no one loves him, and the family ignores him and many other similar problems in his mind.
While he wants to live a better life, he sees running away from home as the last solution to his problems. Unfortunately, parents ignore the child’s wishes and impose their preferred lifestyle on them. A lot of pressure is put on the child to conform and as a result the child is overburdened to live up to expectations. And if, with less luck, they fail to live up to their parents’ expectations, they are given the badge of failure, thereby burying the child’s creativity. Considering the causes of running away from home, it is assumed that it involves both physical and environmental factors. When it comes to creating awareness and awareness in families, the first and foremost task is to bridge the gap in communication. It is necessary that we listen carefully to each other and always make decisions with our rational mind rather than our emotional mind and also we should not vent our anger on others during the conversation.
Be sure to tell the person in front of you what you’ve observed about them, but don’t make fun of their personality. Use “I” instead of “you” during conversation. Because blaming does not help to keep the conversation going. There are also some misconceptions about escapism, the most popular of which is that “children who run away make their own decisions should be let go so that they can make their own choices and be responsible for the consequences.” Be yourself.” If they want to come back home, they can. This false belief is based on a false hypothesis, the effects of which can prove to be even more dangerous. While a runaway child is already exposed to danger. This is a false assumption that an immature person can make real decisions and carefully plan a course of action for himself, whereas the truth is that at the age of puberty, the child’s brain is still going through the stages of development that Due to very poor decision making and emotionality is observed.
If a person is thinking about running away, many changes can be seen around him such as changes in his eating and sleeping patterns, extreme mood swings, inappropriate behavior at school, A significant drop in school attendance, hoarding money, giving away valuables and the individual will appear to indicate that if I am gone, no one will miss me or no one will care. Most importantly, to get to the root of the escape, runaways usually have various problems such as anxiety, adjustment disorder, low self-esteem, depression, anger, violence and mood swings. Diseases like depression and bipolar disorder etc. If there are signs of escape in the life of an immature child, there is a need to properly diagnose and find solutions to the problems through communication with them. Instead of punishing them, they should be helped. If he is not able to talk openly with you. So contact a psychologist, school advisory council, teacher or an influential relative.
The real problems of the absconding person should be uncovered that there is no mental illness or mental, emotional and sexual abuse that the child is forced to endure?
It is also possible that the parenting style of the parents is making the children rebellious, controlling too much or otherwise causing sick love to distort their personality. Apart from this, there may be a problem in school as well. Being teased at school, being mentally, sexually harassed, fighting, being bullied or even being bullied can cause him to run away. Be it the environment of the home or the school, the reason for the escape should be honestly acknowledged and the feeling of being a helpless helper should be removed from the child’s mind. He should be reassured of your unconditional love. If he does get angry, take a positive approach and make him realize that escaping will multiply his problems instead of solving them. Sick love is also a major cause of personal deterioration. Too much freedom also makes a person rebellious. So strike a balance and establish healthy love rules so that the child can avoid unruly behavior. Similarly, keep revising your principles from time to time. Create new interests in the child’s life. Get him involved in a hobby and keep encouraging him.